September 8, 2019

Developing Greater Emotional Competency

Since the term Emotional Intelligence (EI)  was popularized in the mid -1990’s by former New York Times science writer, Daniel Goleman, work on EI has found its way into mainstream business. Goleman’s first book, Emotional Intelligence,  was based on the work of university researchers John Mayer and Peter Salovey, who were trying to scientifically measure the difference in people’s emotional abilities.  At the […]
September 1, 2019

Cynicism – The Price We All Pay

“Cynicism is an unproductive reaction to disappointment. It springs from the helplessness people feel when they are disappointed by others and allow themselves to become detached observers rather than active participants.”     Jamie & Maren Showkeir  Have you become a cynic?  If so, you’ve got plenty of company. Some might call this the era of cynicism. Some might even say, that’s […]
March 11, 2019

The Starting Point for Empathy is You

In a series of articles,  we’ve explored some reasons to consciously act on developing our empathic skills.  We cannot expect to extend our empathy to others in the fullest sense unless we are capable of giving it to ourselves first. The reality is that we are often as hard on ourselves as we are on others.  We’ve often joked that if we sat […]
June 11, 2016

The 5 Habits of an Empathetic Communicator

How we respond to others is largely a function of habit. Many small, repetitive, automatic responses that grow over a long period of time form habits. Mostly, these reactions are outside of our conscious awareness. They’re built on foundations formed by our beliefs, and in most cases, they stayed fixed, usually reinforcing old beliefs and naturally – old habits. Charles […]
October 11, 2015

There is Nothing Soft about "Soft Skills"

Ever since I began to work in the business world, the term “soft skills” always felt off to me. The more I come to appreciate the complexity of human dynamics, the more off it feels. In my experience, there is nothing soft or easy about mastering people skills. In fact, when I look around, especially in the workplace, clear and effective […]
June 11, 2015

How Emotions Shape Decision Making

Since this piece was first published, it’s been in the top 5 of viewed articles every day. Clearly – the head vs. heart conflict is very much alive.  There is little disagreement that effective decision-making is one of the most important tasks we have in every part of life. If we were to take a survey in the average workplace […]
January 13, 2015

Are You Listening? The Essentials of Real Listening

“Some lucky people seem to have a magic touch when it comes to getting people to buy into their plans, goals and desires. But, in reality, reaching people isn’t magic. It’s an art…and a science.  And it’s easier than you think.”   Mark Goulston, author, Just Listen Yes, we all know that listening is important. It is considered, by broad […]
November 1, 2014

Why Worry? ~ the Emotion Series

Worry is a trap. Lately, I’ve been falling into the worry trap too often. I’ve found myself worrying about many things. I worry about ________________. I worry about the ______________. I worry when _________________. I worry about – OK, that’s enough because mental rehearsal is the engine that powers worry. Despite many years of dedicated effort to raise my level of […]
February 25, 2014

Becoming More Empathetic – (Bringing Down Some of the Barriers)

Most scientists agree that we are born to cooperate with others.  In other words, we are born to be more “WE”  than “ME.”  Sometimes we wonder. The mounting research continues to paint a much rosier and more positive picture at least for the potential of a kinder, gentler workplace, society and planet. According to Dr. Thomas Tomasello, author of “Why […]